The brutal truth about relationships…

Black coffee and cigarettes

… is that they’re hard. I think I may have subconsciously avoided long-term relationships for precisely this reason for most of my life. I used to tell people I couldn’t imagine anything worse than domesticity, or the proverbial white picket fence, or the banality and routine—the grind!—of a long-term relationship or marriage.

Having been in one now for a good few years, I can tell you that parts of me still feel the same. In the first warm glow of love, you may think such feelings are impossible, but you understand in time how the patina of love gently fades; how familiarity—little by little—can breed contempt, or at least disdain; and how easy it is to feel disconnected and further and further away from the person closest to you, physically and emotionally.

Despite all this, there’s always been a part of me that’s admired most those couples who stay together…

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